| |  | LATEST BLOG ENTRIES |
I was in the middle of watching "Yo Gabba Gabba"... which isn't creepy at all... when suddenly I had an urge to go to the bathroom. I became furious. Not only must I now abandon my dancing puppet friends, but I was officially losing 10-15 minutes of my life. Grr... it's so annoying. Call me lazy, but why can't the human body be more efficient? Birds poop in like two seconds (and it often lands on people's heads... heehee). We're backwards. Birds have to poop in order to move, but humans have to move in order to poop. [...] |
|
Two years ago, I woke up in my dorm to find my roommate, and several of his friends, hovering over my bed. Each one of them had a huge, suspicious grin. Naturally, I thought they had sharpied a dingdong on my face. It turns out, they were actually laughing at the strange noises I was making. Apparently, I moan in my sleep. Now, to my knowledge, these aren't sexual moans (if they are, I deserve more exciting dreams). Rather, it's more like I fail at breathing. A quick search on Google shows that I'm not alone. [...] |
|
Since its creation in 1973, the cellphone has been saving the world from awkward situations. I mean, imagine you're hauling ass across campus back to your dorm the night after a crazy party. You see a creepy guy from the party named Ted that you'd made out with, and he doesn't look anywhere near as good as he did then. Also, Ted smells like kitten poop. Where would you be if you couldn't pull out your cellphone and pretend to be doing something important while you pass him? [...] |
|
| |
|
|
About Justin
